It is now 17 days after the wedding, and I sure can tell you how sad I am! I adore being a new wife and I want to do everything right, but the void of no wedding planning sure has sunk in. I found my bridal book that I carried literally everywhere with me for almost 2 years and while it is breaking and pages are falling out, I could and would not throw it away! Planning a wedding had become my favorite thing to do and putting it all away is really very sad to me! I told Scott months ago that I would go through some sort of post-partum with not carrying around that book, not scouring magazines, not thinking and shopping and doing all that fun stuff. His response was a "Thank God!" You see, while I remember all the good and fun things that went into planning a wedding, he saw all the negative stressed out things it brought out in me. His biggest happiness was knowing he did not have to see that "filthy" bridal notebook again (yes, he's right, it is really dirty and so torn up!) But I had really forgotten all the stressful times of planning a wedding and I miss it so!
As for the wedding, not to toot my own horn, but dang, that was one awesome wedding! All that planning sure did come in handy. And the thing I loved about it was how close I became to the people that helped out the most. Mom and I have become much closer. I see pics of my dad beaming from ear to ear and get so excited. Watching Heather get so wrapped up in it all made it all worthwhile. I have an amazing support system in my family, and it was evident on my wedding day as you could just feel the love in the air.
I have so many memories of that day. My mom looking AMAZING, my dad walking me down the aisle, my bridal party being so supportive, John Kramer telling me how excited he was, partying until I couldn't stand up, Mrs. Debbie just being Mrs. Debbie and thankfully taking care of everything in the background, Bro. Tim leading a beautiful wedding, family and friends from far and near coming to celebrate the fact that true love is what matters most.
I am sad it is over, and I think the reason I am so sad is not because all the planning is over, but that all of those moments that were shared are now just memories. I wish I could lock them away and relive them everyday, but each day that passes I forget one more thing. I know that more memories will come and new challenges will lay before us, but that day was so magical, so full of life, so full of love. I didn't want it to end.
I don't know what more to say, as I sit here misty eyed, but I do know one thing. I love all of you. You who opened up your pocketbooks (aahh.... that one's for you mom and dad) who opened your hearts to the love that Scott and I share, you whose presence made the day so special. You are the one's who need to be thanked, you are the one's who God put in my life so my life will be better.
And with that... when can we party again? (In our play clothes this time?)
