open letters

I would like to begin a series of "open letters" to things or people or organizations I would like to pick a bone with or tell them something funny. I'll try to post one every day until I get it all off my chest. These are things I might say if I didn't have a censor!


Dear Strawberry Newtons,
I love you. With a deep love. And I love you so much I sit down to just eat 3 of you and I look down and have eaten 8. You are that delicious. So delicious I try to hide them from my child so she will not love them. I finally checked the package yesterday to see how many calories I am shoveling down my throat and I was sad to see that for every 2 I gain 100 calories. Does this stop me? No. And when I pass by your lovely yellow packaging in the Publix I know I am in for such a tasty sensation I cannot say no. Do you have some kind of Newton's Anonymous? I would be the one waiting in the room with a cup of coffee trying not to think of how badly I would like a Strawberry Newton. This is all.
With love,
Nikki