This is a sweet video of Lola I found today while playing on the computer. Lola has been in doggy heaven for about 5 months, and the pain has gotten much easier, but I still miss her prissy self dearly. So to you Lolita Bonita Chiquita...

And try hard not to laugh at my voice. I guess that's my doggy voice, especially the "I don't want you nasty" that I repeat over and over at the end. I laughed so hard I cried! And the reason she is scooting on her belly is because I put a sock around her belly.

Top Five

I have been mentally making a list of all the thing I love about being pregnant in my head for awhile. So here it is... my top five favorite things about being Prego.

5. Seeing other pregnant women on the street gives you a real reason to stare at their belly. First for a little moment of "whooo.... I'm glad I'm not that big" to "I wonder how far long she is." I do love this. It's my license to stare card. And she in return doesn't look at me like a stalker. She's probably thinking the same dang thing about me.

4. Stretchy pants. Good God. How have I lived my whole life not wearing stretchy pants? I can bend over without a button cutting into my navel. I can breath when I sit down (except on the days my undies roll down with the belly.) I just think these stretchy belly pants are a fab way to feel pretty!

3. My 20 pound weight loss. I know. I break the rules with this. But when that stick said "pregnant" I vowed to change my eating habits. I figured my baby needed to be smart (you know with a teacher mom and all) so I started eating fresh fruits and veggies. Now losing that glass of wine can't hurt either, and you won't see me eating nothing but good stuff, but I did change alot about how I ate. I still crave hot wings and strawberry milkshakes, but for the most part, I will take real strawberries over the milkshake any day.

2. The cutest dang clothes for her. I am glad I am teaching after school tutorial. That money has come in handy. I have done really well with just cheap stuff. And people that say"you will not want to spend on yourself anymore" don't know me. I buy for her, I buy for me. We both have to look good, right? Poor Scott.

1. And the last reason I like being prego... no, its not all the attention, or the free pass to be gassy, or the excuse to be really lazy, it's just the fact at how it has changed Scott and I already. Before, it wouldn't bother me to go out without him or spend time with my friends when he was home, but now... I look forward to the time we have by ourselves. I know it is going by fast, this time it is just Nikki and Scott, and I want to savor it all I can. I want Lucy Clare in the most loving environment. I want her to feel the love between the two of us.

So, this was no David Letterman countdown, but I do love being pregnant. I can't wait to hold sweet Lucy Clare in my arms for the first time. She is going to be one spoiled girl, just like her momma.

HONK!

I was driving down the road the other day, as I do each day, when I was forced to use my horn. This happens on a daily occurrence. I love to use the horn. I feel the power when I use my horn. I really, really love to honk my horn. I could be blaring my Praise and Worship music, just loving the Lord, when bam.... some lovely person pulls out and I have to use my horn. You see, some of my family members do not believe in the "power of the horn" so when I am in the car with them, I am forced to do the reach over and honk for them. This really makes my husband mad. A lot. He usually slaps my arm away and now says, "Ugh. You are pregnant. That's probably not a good thing for you to do." This in turn causes me to give him a very valid argument. And everyone knows a pregnant woman is going to win her argument!

You are in charge of a massive amount of steel, iron, whatever a car is made of when you drive. Someone has said you are competent enough to get a license and drive on the road. This is a big responsibility. And if you are somewhat young, you were made to take driver's ed. (don't even get me started on people that need to go back to that course again!) So you know that driving is a big responsibility. Now, if you are not paying attention and you come over into my lane, or pull out in front of me, or try to back out on me, you are telling me that you don't care about your wonderful piece of steel you are driving or about your life. Which in turn, makes you not care about my life, or the life I am carrying, or the life of my family member. This is where you need to be told. This is where I HONK. I will honk for five minutes if it was serious enough for me to be scared. Then, oh forbid, we pull up next to each other. I will stare you down. Get a good look at me, fool. You.could.have.killed.me. Thank you. My mother swears I am going to put someone into road rage. "People have guns you know!" I just feel like driving is a pretty serious thing and I would rather not be hit by you if I can help it. And then, maybe the next time you are thinking of changing lanes without looking, you'll worry if the girl in the Black Pilot is gonna honk at you.

And I will apologize to my family for the reach over. I'm not going to stop doing it, but I love you!

Now... the four letter words I spew at you are for another post. Yes, I am guilty of that too. Usually when I am laying on the horn.

Finally, November

A month of crying and a month of joy, all wrapped up into a package called October. The month started out joyous... The annulment finally came through with a YES and now Scott and I can be married in my home church and I can become "real" Catholic again! (JOY!) It's been a long, tedious, and very tiring journey, but faith in our Father is all I can say got me through it, along with all that have prayed so fervently for it!

Then it was my 29th birthday! Wow, I am getting old! We celebrated at the New House.. yes, that came in August/September, and my girlfriends from Gainseville came up for some festivities. (Joy!) Then sadness when I fell and tore my elbow up! (Cry!) It still hurts and for the first time in forever I was honestly embarrassed!
After my birthday, it was Fall Break (JOY!!) No school for an entire week. Scott and I went to Orlando while he worked and then had play time at Universal Studios. Here is where my eye becomes swollen shut and I get a nasty raunchy case of conjuctivitis! Only I would get this on vacation! (Cry!) It clears up by the time we leave, thank God!


I return home to a sick dog at mom's house. Lola and Frannie (my former chihuahuas that loved my parents too much to part with them so forever stayed when I moved on) were sick. The next morning I was up early (JOY! really, I never get up early) when Heather called to say Lola died in the night due to her sickness. (CRY.CRY.CRY.CRY.CRY.) Pretty much I think that is all we did. Still hurts, still crying, but going to get better.
Then the video grant I was writing for $25,000 did not make it in by the deadline. I am still bummed about this one, but, I didn't cry!

While this month will definitely go down in my history, I've learned lessons and become stronger. Isn't that what God is really using things in our life for? Because if I honestly said I didn't learn anything, I could not call myself a Christian. His plan always trumps mine.

Praise Him!

I just wanted to give a quick note and let everyone know that God is good! I met with Father Gallagher last week and he informed me that the first part of our annulment has finally gone through with a YES! Now, we hold our breath as it is sent to Louisiana. Once they give the yes, we can then have our blessing in the Catholic Church and I can begin receiving Communion again! I am very excited and blessed from all of your prayers. Please keep them coming! And while you are praying for us, could you pray also for a house for us? I told God I wasn't trying to be selfish, but I would really love to get out of this townhome! Thank you everyone and special big thanks to our God!

the picture above is from a church in St. Thomas. We visted it on our honeymoon. I spent a little time praying in there for our annulment!

Oh, Happy Day!

It is now 17 days after the wedding, and I sure can tell you how sad I am! I adore being a new wife and I want to do everything right, but the void of no wedding planning sure has sunk in. I found my bridal book that I carried literally everywhere with me for almost 2 years and while it is breaking and pages are falling out, I could and would not throw it away! Planning a wedding had become my favorite thing to do and putting it all away is really very sad to me! I told Scott months ago that I would go through some sort of post-partum with not carrying around that book, not scouring magazines, not thinking and shopping and doing all that fun stuff. His response was a "Thank God!" You see, while I remember all the good and fun things that went into planning a wedding, he saw all the negative stressed out things it brought out in me. His biggest happiness was knowing he did not have to see that "filthy" bridal notebook again (yes, he's right, it is really dirty and so torn up!) But I had really forgotten all the stressful times of planning a wedding and I miss it so!
As for the wedding, not to toot my own horn, but dang, that was one awesome wedding! All that planning sure did come in handy. And the thing I loved about it was how close I became to the people that helped out the most. Mom and I have become much closer. I see pics of my dad beaming from ear to ear and get so excited. Watching Heather get so wrapped up in it all made it all worthwhile. I have an amazing support system in my family, and it was evident on my wedding day as you could just feel the love in the air.
I have so many memories of that day. My mom looking AMAZING, my dad walking me down the aisle, my bridal party being so supportive, John Kramer telling me how excited he was, partying until I couldn't stand up, Mrs. Debbie just being Mrs. Debbie and thankfully taking care of everything in the background, Bro. Tim leading a beautiful wedding, family and friends from far and near coming to celebrate the fact that true love is what matters most.
I am sad it is over, and I think the reason I am so sad is not because all the planning is over, but that all of those moments that were shared are now just memories. I wish I could lock them away and relive them everyday, but each day that passes I forget one more thing. I know that more memories will come and new challenges will lay before us, but that day was so magical, so full of life, so full of love. I didn't want it to end.
I don't know what more to say, as I sit here misty eyed, but I do know one thing. I love all of you. You who opened up your pocketbooks (aahh.... that one's for you mom and dad) who opened your hearts to the love that Scott and I share, you whose presence made the day so special. You are the one's who need to be thanked, you are the one's who God put in my life so my life will be better.
And with that... when can we party again? (In our play clothes this time?)

one month...four days

All right... the home stretch is coming for the wedding and as each day passes, I get more and more stressed out! I didn't think I was stressing, but my stomach tells me otherwise! And those beautiful hivey things I get on my face when I am thinking about the wedding. Those are great, they look like mosquito bites that only last for about an hour. I know that I am also super stressed about buying a house. Things just aren't working our way on getting a home loan, and because I am so financially challenged, I have no idea what Scott is talking about, even when I try! I try to ask questions, but I feel I just frustrate him! Just say a little prayer that we make it through this!
On another note, I have always been a fan of pre-marriage counseling, but I am a super advocate for it now! We had our first session last week and in that hour we covered the major topics. I really thought Scott and I communicated, but boy, I was wrong! We were missing some major issues. I like going, because I can't cop out and walk away from the things that scare me the most. I really left that day with emotions running wild and more in love with Scott than ever! Don't get me wrong... it was such an emotional meeting, but I did really love every minute of it, even when it got very uncomfortable. Having the counselor there to mediate was great. He made the questions just flow and gave us lots of advice. I can't wait to go back next week!
I am very excited to be starting my life with Scott. I truly believe that this is who God created just for me. I look back at my crazy life and I'm sure as we all do, I wish that I had done different things (like have PERFECT credit and really paid attention in finance class!) but in the end, this man is going to accept me for all that I am, as I will accept his constant "huh?" when I ask him a question and his slow southern drawl when he tells a story!
As for now, I cannot believe the wedding is in one month and four days! It seems like just yesterday I was so upset I was waiting a year and half to get married! As sad as it is that I am not getting married in my home church, those who will be there with us are the ones who know how important Scott means to me. It is going to be a wonderful day! Now, if I can just figure out how to get rid of those hivey things!